TO FORGIVE : Cease to resent , pardon . FORGIVENESS : act of forgiving , state of being forgiven . These are my diary 's description for forgiveness . All religions , therapists and philosophers will say that it is necessary to find forgiveness in order for one to leave the past behind and leave your life free of anger or bitterness that you have , due to people or circumstances harming you . Many people spend years in therapy searching for this elusive act that will free them from their pain . You've got to leave the past behind , you will be advised - just forgive and move on . But it doesn't seem to matter how many times you pardon the pain still festers . You try and forgive yourself and other people , but you cannot clear it from your psyche and your anger will occasionally break out hurting you and sometimes you love the most in your life.
It appears one of Life's cruel tricks that a victim has to find forgiveness to remove the pain of a certain event , whilst the perpetrator continues his or her life , showing no remorse whilst the victim is eaten up with bitterness and anger . This is often true in extreme cases like murder or rape and individuals can carry these scars to their graves. Actually , these painful events are huge opportunities to enter into your subconcious and discover the pain that already exists there . Any failure , loss or abandonment is a chance to deal with the underlying causes of the frustrations , anger , resentment and jealousy that we all deal with , because these emotions are not caused by the event but already exist within us and are only triggered by painful events . On the other hand , positive emotions tend to be caused when things happen that diminish the negative emotions .For example , if you get a pay rise at work , you think you are happy because you have more money , but it is really because your fear of poverty and your feelings of inadequacy are reduced .You may even feel that you are now better than your co-workers and a superior human being . But these feelings only last for a short time and you will soon return to your fear and feelings of inadequacy and will try different strategies eg chemical addiction , exercise or work to block these feelings .
What is the underlying cause of all this heartbreak and suffering in this world ? What don't we want to feel ? I believe that we are trying to escape from Life , because the greatest fear we have is the universes' love , which is within us and outside of ourselves . The anger you feel is really directed against this - when something ' bad ' happens you are saying that Life is not good enough and there should be something better . In fact that is all there is - the feeling you and I are running away from and hate more than anything else is Love. The world we see , full of war and hate comes from this - the world has projected this onto itself and this is what we get . God , the Universe - whatever your description for Life is , loves us completely and without reservation , whatever we have done.
The cause of this conflict is the belief in death and belief in the reality of the physical .This has led us to thinking we are gulity and that we are not loved or good enough . So , how can we deal with these erroneous thoughts - what can remove these blocks which stop us knowing ourselves fully . The key that will unturn the lock is Forgiveness . The real meaning of forgiveness is not that of pardon but is giving . This is not something we have to try and discover but is our natural state of being .
Our world's definition of giving is ' Give and Take ' , which is really just taking . How many times have you been angry because someone did not return a favour or appreciate something you did for them - this anger implies that deep in you , you were expecting something in return and were not giving but taking . To give is to love and love is the force that will remove the thoughts of guilt and death . This is the feeling that we feel 24 hours a day , 365 days a year and try and ignore the best we can . IT IS NOT GOING TO GO AWAY ! It is what we are . There is tremendous resistance within the human psyche and the way through this is to accept the feelings . Our so called negative emotions are signs that we are feeling this healing energy but not accepting it. Once you realise this , the only thing you can do is try and make a space within you for this force . Lie back and think of England if you like . It is not something to fear even though it may cause conflict inside of you , because underneath all the layers of negativity is you - the You that you know you are . Just accept and accept and accept again and one day we will return to our natural state . It has never gone away and never will.